Musings

Existence
Unsolved mystery
This unbreakable code
Mocking
All our senses

Yet

Yearning
This hopeless yearning
Yearning to know
Neither feels insulted
Nor dies a silent death

Ponderings

I long for the sea
sheer mystery of it
The silent waves………carrying a story
Clashing
Breaking
Receding back……..to carry another one

Stories of incomplete lives
Broken hearts
And love unconsummated

Not only that
In some secret corner
From time immemorial
Carry tales of slaughter
Deceit
Lust
And caprice too

Their deadly silence
Holding so much violence
Dumbfounded by the utter noise of hatred
Possessing power to benumb the senses
Ironically
Bestow a strange sense of peace

Perhaps
Human optimism
In its extreme
Waiting to find in debris
Beginning of a new life.

महाम्हौपाध्याय डॉक्टर गोपीनाथ कविराज और काश्मीर्य शैव दर्शन

My first write-up in hindi

Sunday on the island of Elephanta: by Octavio Paz

I had been introduced to Paz way back in year 2000 but somehow never got to delve too much into his writings...probably because they have not been written in english...I remember finding him extremely profound and simple. The directness of his approach instantly appealed to me...
and when last night me and my husband got to read his poems i couldn't help but marvel at his style...
Moreover Elepanta holds a very special place in my heart...its the first arthistorical site that i visited with my department...i recall being completely floored by the over life size sculptures of siva in various lilamurtis...



Here is Sunday on the island of Elephanta by Paz trans by Eliot Weinberger.....hope every one enjoys it as much as i did

IMPRECATION:
At the feet of the sublime sculptures,
disfigured by the Muslims and the Portuguese,
the crowds have left a picnic of garbage
for the crows and dogs
I condemn them to be reborn a hundred times
on a dungheap,
and as for the others,
for eons they must carve living flesh
in the hell for the mutilators of statues

INVOCATION:
Shiva and Parvati:
we worship you
not as gods
but as images
of the divinity of man
You are what man makes and is not,
what man will be
when he has served the sentence of hard labor
Shiva:
your four arms are four rivers,
four jets of water.
Your whole being is a fountain
where the lovely Parvati bathes,
where she rocks like a graceful boat.
The sea beats beneath the sun:
it is the great lips of Shiva laughing;
the sea is ablaze:
it is the steps of parvati on the waters
Shiva and Parvati:
the woman who is my wife
and I
ask you for nothing, nothing
that comes from the other world:
only
the light on the sea,
the barefoot light on the sleeping land and sea.

Enquiry into the sectarian affiliation of Harwan

This paper seeks to address questions of representation and interpretation of the monuments unearthed at Harwan, Kashmir. These days, strenuous efforts are being made to project Harwan as an unproblematic Buddhist site and promote it as a destination for cultural tourism by linking it with the great Central Asian tradition. In this effort, scholars have deliberately underplayed facts and attributed all monuments found in the area to Buddhists, ignoring any other cultic possibility.

to read the edited version log on to http://www.vijayvaani.com/FrmPublicDisplayArticle.aspx?id=285

Toying with my computer

Jesus in Kashmir: A book review

Jesus in Kashmir The lost tomb by Suzanne Olsson is an eclectic mix of science fiction , hypothetical racial claims and a good number of fantastic speculations and possibilities. The entire work is focused at justifying the legitimate claim of Jesus on the throne of Kashmir and his having been buried in a tomb named ‘Roza Bal’ in Kashmir.What seems to have instigated the author in writing the book is the so called deliberate proclamation of the site as an Islamic one and the misuse of the money donated to the shrine by Islamic fundamentalists.

(to read the edited version log on to http://www.vijayvaani.com/FrmPublicDisplayArticle.aspx?id=215

My brush with sublime

While making last minute notes for my class on Kant and his insights on sublime and beautiful I lingered much longer than required on the former concept.It brought alive some pleasant memories of bygone days. To be precise I was reminded of our study tour to western Indian rock caves and particularly the journey to Nane Ghat situated in Western ghats. It was raining cats and dogs that day with hardly any visibility .Road was extremely narrow and I thought the scene was right for shooting a thriller movie.


I remember leaving my seat to sit on one of those red satin mattresses put on the front of bus where seats had been removed.As I looked out of the window the road was nowhere in sight..it almost seemed as if the bus was gliding on the valley.For a moment my heart stopped beating ..it was scary but probably it was more than that…because after a short time the fear was replaced by the sense of awe and respect for nature. The breathtakingly beautiful lush green mountains and gurgling sounds made by the river down in the valley had a wonderful impact on me.

While I was undergoing these unexplainable emotions which I am trying to weave in words I saw another bus coming from the opposite side. Suddenly I was curious to see how our driver would negotiate the problem.After what seemed like an eternity our bus driver reversed the vehicle and adjusted it so that one of its rear wheels was no longer on the road but was hanging in the air. Getting enough space the other bus moved ahead but I will never be able to forget the experience of hanging in mid air…It was fear mixed with extreme devotion…it made me feel so small…I was almost in a trance but I do clearly remember my thoughts which ran as……………

god I would have no regrets if I were to fall and die in this valley

Not that I have any suicidal tendencies but nature in its wildest form does have a maddening impact on people…it can make you cry, laugh, feel extremely insignificant or as I experienced ,happy to die it its lap….probably this is what Kant meant by a sublime experience………..

A trip to Kayavarohana

Last night before going off to sleep I hoped and prayed with all my heart for heavens not to pour the next day.After canceling and postponing for what seems like an eternity I had finally decided to go to Kayavarohan (Karvan) for my first documention trip and noway did I want the plan to get cancelled again. My prayers had been generously answered, there was no rain and on top of that it was a bright and beautiful day. Had an early breakfast and left for the station armed with my camera and notebooks. After a half an hour wait I managed to get into a bus which would directly take me to Kayavarohan once inside I got talking to the elderly couple who were waiting with me. Interestingly the husband knew quite some about the temple and was extremely glad that someone was working on the particular site. They had to get off the bus before me and we parted with a cheerful ‘aavjo’ and his words ‘you are doing a good job...

Since I was visiting the site for the first time I was anxious not to miss the stop. The old woman sitting next to me who must have been in her eighties finally asked me where I was going. Interestingly she would pull my arm whenever I was about to get up to ask the conductor…still remember her kind and assuring face…’haji vaar che…hu tamne kahish’ I had no choice but to sit with an disarming smile. She kept her word …just few seconds before reaching the temple she told me to stand in front otherwise it would be difficult to get out of the crowded bus.

Contrary to what I had expected I came across a well maintained temple gate flanked with all kinds of shops. Inside to my utter surprise there was standing a late temple structure with amazingly well maintained lawns and fountain. Didn’t look like a site at all. The temple has been construced in 1971 but the idol inside is ancient and the iconography of the temple is what I was interested in. I took a general round and to my chagrin saw a ‘no photography’ board. After the usual darshan I realized that there were all kinds of yogic postures displayed on the walls along with various mantras and mahatmayas. The walls of both garbhagriha and mandapa were completely covered with writings…shivmahimnastotram, rudrashtakam etc. haven’t come across any temple like this before…dpwnstairs I was amazed to find whole pasupata sutra written on the walls…clear in red ink…it was a shame that I couldn’t click photographs. I decided to try my luck and went to the main office. Fortunately enough I was able to meet the trustee who was pretty helpful and guess what not only did he let me click the photographs, but he also asked one of the volunteers to go with me. He also supplied me generously with some extremely useful literature about the history of the temple.Generosity didn’t end there he asked me to have lunch at the campus itself once my work was over. I told him I wanted to see the other temples in the village too and he gave me a long list. After clicking all the desired photographs I thanked him profusely and made some notes.

Once outside I started inquiring about the archeological museum displaying all the rare finds from the site. After walking for some 15 minutes I reached to an isolated rather dull loking building which a panwala confirmed was the museum.Though there was a man standing there I could see the heavy lock on the gote…I inquired bhai museum aaje bandh che?

Na behn, koi aavtu nathi aetle lock marya che…tame jovo to kholoon

He did open the gate with reluctance and right in the outset told me not to click any photographs. The collection was beautiful though most of it was broken. I particularly liked a little less than lifesize sculpture of kala bairava. The ematiated form and the violent posture lend an eerie feeling to the image.

I was pretty tired and could do with some icecream and also thought of asking the locals for some information about the temples. The shopkeeper lady told me that bhagwan rajarajesvar temple was deep inside the village and there was the other sivalinga I was looking for.Actually the broken temple I was looking for had been renovated hence no one could tell me where the broken temple is. So I took her leave and set afoot again. Meanwhile I kept asking people for the direction and knowing my wonderful sense of direction was mentally making a note of landmarks. I passed through various lanes bylanes darwazas to reach my destination. The temple has been renovated so there is nothong interesting about the structure but I did find the sivalinga I was looking for.After clicking photographs I talked to the caretaker madhuben and her grandson. On my way back I clicked some photographs of the village and reached the village bus stop.I was told I had just missed a bus to baroda and the next would take some time to come. I took a minibus more like a chakda to por, the nearest town from where I was told I will easily get a bus to baroda. Once in the bus I started reading the literature that I had got in the temple. Got so engrossed in reading that realize when we reached baroda.

As soon as I got down the bus I rushed to the hostel and after having a ‘solid naashta’ crashed onmy bed.

An open letter to Niyeti

Dear Niyeti,

Since a long time your drawings are saved in my computer. Whenever I open ‘My pictures’ the folder containing them stares at my face and forces me to open it. I click on it and there it reveals an array of drawings talking about your exciting artistic journey which I have been following closely.

I have been wanting to write about them but ironically the things I want to do the most are the ones that give me maximum starting trouble I kept waiting for the right time…does the right time really come? Who knows? Probably it does …that’s why I am writing…getting too cynical I guess…chal let me come to the point..

First time I saw these drawings I recalled your early BFA works…your silent yet firm effort to gradually do away with the conventional form and still express your deepest feelings….your effort to reduce everything to lines and planes….everything rolled in front of my eyes like a motion picture. I was reminded of our loooong discussions, our aspirations and not to forget the crazy 10 O clock syndrome…because its every tiny moment which we live to the fullest that makes us what we are..

I often marveled at your ability to be different…to go for absolutely abstract works in a place like Baroda which is known for its figurative narrative trend. The painstaking method, the absolute faith and trust and last but not the least the love and passion you have for your works make them very special for me.

I think these latest drawings are a genuine example of learning unlearning and in the process learning something totally unconventional….Was I glad to see forms in your works…not that forms are essential but because I had anticipated that one fine day you will come up with a language of your own…and here I can see the elementary alphabets..

Now you are ready to speak…speak your heart out. What is the most exciting part is that you have arrived here after a long journey through difficult paths…an outstanding one…and had to face severe criticism from various quarters…But unmoved by all this you steered ahead and definitely have made a mark for yourself. You still have a long long way to go…

Wishing you all the luck and success

Love
Geetika